Chapter 7 The Man You Need
Lois stares at Ned in complete shock. She doesn't know what to say.
Luckily she doesn't have to say anything.
"Come inside, you must be freezing out there," Ned insists. He takes her
arm gently, pulls her inside and closes the door behind her. "Here let
me take your coat."
His hands touching her collar snaps Lois out of her shock. "What are you
doin' here? Why aren't you in Port Charles? Where's Mrs. Mario?"
"Which question would you like me to answer first?" Ned asks slowly.
Lois' eyes spit fire at him. "Where's Mrs. Mario?" Lois bites out
between gritted teeth.
"I'd say she's half way to the Caribbean by now," Ned says brightly.
"That was always her dream you know. But the poor woman was always
giving every dime she saved to her kids, so they could have a better
life. She's someone who truly deserved to be rewarded for years of
selflessness--"
"What the hell are you doin' here, Ned?!" Lois yells suddenly.
Ned gnaws on his bottom lip gently. "I'm here because you're here, Lois.
And wherever you are is where I need to be," he answers simply.
Lois shakes her head at him. "We've been over this and over this more
times then I can count. It's over, Ned. It has been for a long time."
Ned smiles at her. "I missed you so much, Lois." He chuckles softly. "I
actually believed that for awhile Believed that we were over," he
clarifies. "We're not. Us - this magical, wonderful, beautiful thing
that we are together - can never just end."
Lois shakes her head and widens her eyes. "You're unbelievable--"
"Thank You," Ned says with a smile.
"I wasn't finished," Lois says, her jaw clenched once again. "What are
you doin' in this house?"
"I bought it from Mrs. Mario," Ned replies.
"She would never have sold this house unless ." Lois trails off.
Ned smiles at her. "Unless she finally got her wish to live in the
Caribbean. I knew you'd understand once you had all the facts in your
possession," Ned says happily.
"Ned," Lois says his name on a moan of despair. "This can't happen. I
can't go through it all again. I can't be Mrs. Ned Ashton. I can't be
who you need me to be," she says, her eyes begging him to understand.
Ned smiles at her, cupping her cheek gently. It warms his heart when she
doesn't pull away. "Then I guess it's good I can be the man you need me
to be," he says simply.
Lois shakes her head in confusion. "What?" she asks, completely baffled
by him.
His smile widens. "It's okay you don't have to fully understand it yet.
It still amazes me when I think about it," Ned says in an awe-struck
voice.
"Okay I'll bite. What amazes you when you think about it?" Lois asks
sarcastically.
Ned grins at her, dimples flashing. "I'd love to tell you all about it.
After we have dinner," Ned says, taking her by the shoulders and
steering her into the next room.
Lois digs her heels into the floor. "Hold it, who says I'm gonna have
dinner with you?" Lois asks, annoyed.
Ned leans his face over her shoulder gently. "I have Gloria's homemade
linguini with artichoke hearts sitting on the dining room table," he
whispers temptingly in her ear.
Lois feels a not entirely unpleasant shiver go down her spine. "You've
got Ma on your side now too?" Lois asks, trying to sound angry, but
fearing her voice emerged too softly for that.
"I've always had Gloria on my side," Ned replies softly. He pulls out a
chair and waits for Lois to sit. She does, and he dishes up the pasta.
He sits beside her and takes a bite.
"Well?" Lois asks, raising an eyebrow.
"Well what?" Ned asks once he swallows.
"Are you gonna let me in on how you're the man I need you to be?" Lois
asks, annoyed with him, but amused by him at the same time.
"I will. As soon as you eat the pasta I know you came here for," Ned
says with a smile. "You need to eat regularly," he reminds her softly.
Lois looks down at her food, knowing he's right. Besides - she really
needs some of Ma's pasta. "Fine. But when we're done, I want answers,"
Lois says definitively.
Ned bites back a smile and stuffs more pasta in his mouth to keep from
laughing. Somehow he doesn't think laughing at how cute she is right
now will go over too well given her present state of mind.
Lois sits down on the sofa in the living room. The same black leather
sofa that used to be at the gate house. She shakes her head in
amazement. How did he get the couch, arm chairs, and coffee table here
in one day? Plus buy the house, and get Mrs. Mario's stuff moved out?
She's startled from her thoughts when he sits next to her.
"Hot chocolate?" he offers, extending her a cup.
She smiles tightly and takes the steaming mug. "Thanks. It's the only
caffeine I'm allowed."
"I remember from before, Lois," he says softly.
She nods slowly. "I know you do." Lois stares down into her cup. "Ned, I
can't go through us again, only to wake up and realize our life is
nothing but a fantasy." She holds up a hand to forestall what he's about
to say. "A wonderful, joyous, beautiful fantasy," she says, tears
beginning to form in her eyes. "A fantasy, a life we had together that I
wouldn't give up for anything. But that's all it could ever be. You're
not Eddie Maine," she finishes simply.
"Are you done now?" Ned asks, undaunted from his goal.
Lois narrows her eyes at him. "Yeah," she says warily.
He smiles. "Good." Ned takes her mug out of her hands, and sets both his
and hers down on the coffee table. He takes one of her hands in his. "Do
you love me?" he asks seriously.
"What the hell kinda question is that?" Lois asks in surprise.
His face doesn't change. "It's one that needs to be answered. Do you
love me. Me. Not my family. Not my job. Me."
Lois closes her eyes. "This is pointless. My loving you has nothing to
do with why we can't be--"
Ned cuts her off. "Do you love me?" he asks more insistently.
"Yes!" Lois yells in his face.
Ned smiles as she closes her eyes in frustration at what she just
admitted. "Good. Now we can move on," he says brightly.
"Move on?" Lois asks, her voice tired and defeated.
"Yes, move on. Move on to why I'm the man you need me to be," Ned
replies cheerfully. He looks at her concerned. "Lois, don't look so
upset. This is a good thing."
She looks at him with a sad patronizing smile on his face. "A good thing
huh? By all means, tell me something good."
"I was born Ned Ashton," he begins. "I was bred and raised to be Ned
Ashton. It was all I ever knew, all I ever thought I wanted to be. And
then one night, in a bar in Buffalo, I met you," Ned says softly.
"Ned, there's no point ." Lois trails off when she sees the determined
glint in his eyes. She clamps her lips shut, and inclines her head for
him to continue. Besides - she wants to hear what he has to say.
"And when I met you," Ned continues - as though she'd never interrupted
him - "I saw these . Never before thought of possibilities looming on
the horizon. And suddenly I wanted to reach out, and grab life with both
hands. But I couldn't. Because I didn't know how," he says, a lost
little boy sadness in his voice that makes Lois want to wrap her arms
around him.
"I'm so sorry," Lois says softly.
Ned shakes his head. "Don't be sorry. That's not the point of this
story. May I continue?"
"By all means," Lois says, digging her nails into the couch to keep from
touching him.
"You taught me how," Ned says, not looking at Lois. His eyes seem to
glaze over, not really focusing on anything. "You taught me as much as
you could. But I didn't know how to let it all go. To let go of my
family, of Ned Ashton. I didn't know how to be the person I'd always
wanted to be, but never knew how." He looks at her now. "Do you
understand? It all changed. It all shifted. When you called me, and told
me you were pregnant again my entire world suddenly - finally - became
crystal clear."
Lois opens her mouth, but finds no words coming out. "What does that
mean?" she asks, refusing to let hope enter her heart. It's too late.
She repeats the mantra over and over. Somehow the words don't hold as
much weight as they did only a few moments ago.
"It means that I'm done being Ned Ashton. Finished. From here on in, I'm
Eddie Maine. And whether you like it or not - I'm all yours," he
finishes softly.
Lois sits there silent for a moment. She looks up at him and speaks
finally. "I don't know what to say to that."
He smiles brightly at her. "Don't say anything. Just let it percolate. I
resigned from ELQ. I left Port Charles. I bought this house. I'm here
for the long haul. If it takes forever to convince you, I'll wait
forever. And in the interim, I'm going to spend every moment possible
with my daughter, and taking care of you now, and after you have our
second child," Ned vows.
Lois nods slightly. "I'm so tired right now," Lois says in a voice that
proves the statement to be true.
"Well Brooke is already upstairs in the nursery--"
"I thought Brooke was with Ma and Pops?" Lois asks.
Ned smiles sheepishly. "That was my idea to tell you that. I figured
tonight might go easier if you believed she was with your parents.
Before you accuse me of lying, I'd like to go on record as saying I
never did. That was your mother," he says seriously.
She can't help it. She snickers. "Yea fine, whatever. I need sleep."
"Take the master bedroom. It's right next door to the nursery. This
house was built for maximum comfort and efficiency but if there's
anything you want changed, say the word and it shall be done." He smiles
at her, and cups her cheek in his palm. "I should've known you'd dream
of having nothing less."
"That's why you bought it, huh? Ma told you." She closes her eyes and
shakes her head. "Fine, I don't have the strength to argue. I'll sleep
here. Tonight." She rises and heads for the stairs.
"Lois?"
She turns at his softly spoken question. "Yea?"
"Sweet dreams," he answers softly.
She smiles slightly. "You too," Lois replies as she heads up the stairs.
Once Lois looks in on Brooke, she opens the connecting door to the
master bedroom. She freezes when she sees it. Lois walks toward the bed,
leaving the door open a crack so she can hear Brooke. She runs her hands
over the mattress, closing her eyes in memory. Coffee table, couch, arm
chairs, dinette set, and their bed, all in one day .
She sighs and strips off her clothes. She walks over to the closet and
smiles to find her things already hung up in the closet. He knew. She
shakes her head ruefully. Of course he knew. He's the most arrogant,
egotistical, wonderful sweet man she's ever known. Lois slips her giant
Brooklyn T-shirt over her head and pulls down the covers on the bed. She
snuggles her face into the pillow, and feels a peace settle over her. It
smells like him, is the last conscious thought she has before she drops
off to sleep.
