Chapter 1 The low din of forks clanking and muted chatter amidst candlelit tables and tuxedo-clad waiters allows for the couple in the far corner to go relatively unnoticed despite their decidedly un-anonymous standing in Port Charles. They exchange coy smiles, flirtatious quips and stifled laughter as they play the cat and mouse game they know best. Never revealing too much about their families, never revealing too much about their feelings for one another. Their true attachment divulged only in the imperceptible smile that comes to their faces when, away in their respective worlds, they think how they would have liked to have shared a certain moment with the other. They sit in near-darkness at the PC Grill, both almost hoping not to be seen with the other, bantering about which of them has the most dysfunctional family. Ned: Christmas. You begin. Alexis: Red and green Faberge eggs. Ned: Monogrammed cufflinks every year for the last ten years from my father. Alexis: I spent my 10th Christmas locked in my room for touching the 300 year old crystal manger scene. Ned: Carolers running screaming from the property. Alexis: Every year the blessing over Christmas dinner offered by my uncle consisted of one sentence: "May the Bolsheviks roast in hell, Amen." Ned: Two words: projectile fruitcake. Alexis: Laura Spencer making a tree ornament with the name "Luke" on it and hiding it craftily under the boughs. Ned: Ouch. Alexis: That's what she said when my cousin found it and beat her in a drunken stupor. Ned: Ok, kidnapped wives are pretty twisted. You win this time. Alexis: (smiling smugly). Everything we do is over the top. Christmas is no exception. Ned smiles as he watches her rolling her eyes and reaches across the table to take her hand. Alexis inhales nervously and holds her breath a moment as their fingers touch, not knowing how to feel about his affection. An awkward silence ensues and Alexis looks away, somewhat flustered by his gaze which always feels... demanding. Ned: (sarcastically) When are you going to let me take you away from all this? Alexis: The same day you run away with me to Greece. Ned: God forbid. Alexis: Helena too. They toast. Ned: To dysfunction. Alexis: Now and forever. They laugh quietly and sip white wine, Alexis grateful for the temporary distraction. Ned has a way of cutting to the matter and forcing her into emotional complexity far beyond her intention. Alexis: So, how are you going to explain the disaster in Jakarta? Ned: (cringing) Well, perhaps we can make up for it by opening up new markets in South America. I've been looking into a very potential profit based in Argentina. Whatever happens, I'll have to be focusing on work a lot more than I have been to make up for the losses this year. Course, the blow might not have been so devastating if you had been waiting for me at a Bali resort when I left our Jakarta office. Alexis: (biting her bottom lip and looking like she's going to be sick) I'm sorry. More than you know. I would have loved to have gone with you... but... Ned: But duty called. Maybe when we're old and gray and our children's children are running the world, we'll run away together to a nudist colony in Bora Bora. We won't have our teeth and we'll be in wheelchairs, but we'll be free! Alexis: (smiling apologetically and somewhat wistfully) It's a date. A cell phone rings and they both reach for it in various places on and near their bodies. Ned: It's mine. (flipping the phone open) Ned Ashton. (listening, his face falls) Yes, I'm her next of kin. What happened?.... Oh... ok, thank God it's not worse. Yes, I want her flown into GH... I don't care if she's protesting... Let me talk to her... (he waits, and then his face lights up at the sound of a new voice) Well well well, look who's all crunched up... I don't give a damn what you'd rather do... I didn't ask... You're coming to Port Charles.... So I can keep an eye on you, that's why... I won't hear another word about it... I'm not going to have you holed up alone in some distant hospital with broken bones.... That's the final word... I do not... I do not.... I am nothing like Grandfather, and I won't forget you said that... You'll be on that helicopter or I'll come get you myself, do you understand?... Well, I could always call Mother to come keep you company... (Alexis can hear the other voice yelling) I love you... Oh admit it, you love me too... See you soon... He turns the phone off and gives Alexis that "don't-hate-me-but-duty-calls" look that they both recognize so quickly. Alexis: Now I'm sure that when she gets older, she'll be a handful, but I really didn't think your daughter was old enough to argue with you yet! Ned: (laughing) No no, that was definitely not my daughter. Alexis: Lois? (he shakes his head no) Ned: (smiling wickedly) I have to run. I'm sorry. We didn't even get past the salad this time. Alexis: (sighing) I know... someday we'll see a main course together. I'm just sure of it. Ned stands up and walks around to Alexis, taking her hand and pulling her up toward him. He steps in closer... Alexis: Ned, let's not have a scene. You do own this place, it's not like you're anonymous. Ned: Ask me if I care. She opens her mouth to protest but he covers it with his own. She is startled but eventually responds to his kiss. They pause, a bit breathless, and Alexis looks down bashfully, hiding her face from the rest of the room in his shoulder... Ned: What's the matter? Afraid the teacher's going to catch us making out in the hallway? Alexis: (laughing) Something like that. Ned: It's ok, around here, I'm the principle. I own the hallway. (He stops and strokes her cheek lightly) Imagine the fun we'll have in Bora Bora, after all the promises we made to make it up to each other. Ned kisses Alexis on her forehead close to her eyes and she sighs heavily as he grabs his briefcase to leave. As he walks away from the table, Alexis calls out to him. Alexis: Hey, who's the person coming to GH? Ned: (smiling devilishly) Someone you're going to like. He winks and turns to go. Chapter 2 Ned strolls into Alan's office as he sifts through paperwork piled a mile high on the desk. Haggardly looking up, Alan greets his nephew. Alan: Don't worry, I heard and I'll take care of her. Ned: I want either you or Monica to treat her. Alan: Ned, Monica is a cardiologist. Aren't we talking about broken ribs here? Ned: I don't care, you two are the best. Alan: I'm a GP. I'll take care of her, that's what I just told you. Although, I don't even know if I'll recognize her, it's been so long. Ned: Don't worry, that drawl is unmistakable. And thank you. Alan: The medevac chopper will be here in 30 minutes. Why don't you just calm down and wait. Ned: I'm calm. I just don't want her coming in here and trying to get away with ordering people around, sucking down Diet Coke and causing general mayhem. Alan: Like mother, like daughter. Ned: That's not funny. Alan: (stifling a chuckle) I'm just glad it's not more serious. Thank God for airbags. Ned: So you'll take care of her? I don't want her thinking she doesn't have to stay in the hospital, you know how ornery she gets... Alan: How many times can I say I'll take care of her? Not that I can guarantee that she'll listen to me. Now, back off while I go meet the medevac. Ned leaves the office and begins pacing in the waiting area. He hears a voice behind him. Alexis: I thought I might as well supply your required battery acid for the evening, since you obviously will be here a while. Ned turns around and she hands him a styrofoam Starbucks cup. Ned: Didn't I just leave you at the Grill? Don't tell me you didn't even have dinner... Alexis: Well, I thought I could at least make myself useful if you were going into task-mode all night. Ned: Thank you. Alexis: Now why don't you identify this mystery woman before I start to get jealous. Ned: Ah, the truth comes out. This was a recon mission, not charity, eh? Alexis: How about a little bit of both? Ned: (slyly) So, you're jealous? I'm touched. Alexis: Should I be? Ned: Hardly. This woman is distracting, to be sure, but not in any way that you should feel threatened by. Alexis: Oh, do tell. Just then, 2 orderlies roll a gurney out of the elevator and a Virginia drawl fills the air. Drawl: I really don't think we should bother the chief of staff with my li'l situation, I mean, I'm sure he has more important things to do, honestly. Ned smiles and turns toward the elevator, crossing his arms over his chest. As the gurney approaches, he calls out to the patient. Ned: Oh I'm quite sure that Dr. Quartermaine would enjoy nothing more than tending to your every medical need, Doctor. Drawl: Oh damn, how did you get over here so durn fast? Ned: Well, it's a pleasure to see you too. Drawl: Let me state for the record right now that I am not going to stay here under your paranoid watch. I am fully qualified to self-assess and I intend to walk out of here within the hour. Ned walks over to the woman on the gurney and takes her hand. Ned: Shut up. Drawl: No, I'm serious Ned, I-- Ned: I said, shut up. (The orderlies stop) I don't ever again want to get a phone call asking if I'm your next of kin, do you hear me? My heart dropped into my stomach. What if you were hurt worse? Drawl: (gently) Aww... Nedster, I'm ok. Just a li'l car wreck. Nothing to worry about. Course that sweet Mustang you gave me for med school graduation has seen its last road. Ned: Are you still driving that thing? Drawl: Yes, Ned, some of us actually own cars longer than a year. And some of us aren't living off our trust funds. Ned: Yeah right, I'll remember that next time I pay for European holidays that you charged to the ELQ corporate account. Drawl: The check's in the mail. Ned: Seriously, this was bad. You scared me. Drawl: I know, it wasn't a walk in the park for me either. Ned: It's great to see you. You've been gone too long. (He leans over and kisses her on the cheek.) I'm glad you're alive and well. Drawl: (noticing Alexis lingering behind Ned) Woo hoo, Nedster, who's the babe in the suit? Ned: (stepping back to include Alexis in the conversation) Ah yes, Alexis Davis, allow me to introduce my sister, Dr. Elisabeth Lila Ashton. Lise: (as Alexis' eyes widen) Good Lord, Ned, what is this, a debutante ball? (holding a hand out to Alexis) Lise will do. Pleasure to meet you. What in the world are you doing with him? No, wait, I take it back... (eyeing Alexis up and down)... actually, you look like a female Ned, so I'm assuming you're equally neurotic, with a comparable number of self-induced ulcers? Alexis: (a bit taken aback, but smiling) Well, yes, actually, that pretty much sums me up. Lise: Wonderful then. God bless you both. Alexis: So it's "Lise", like "please"? Ned: No, more like "fleas". Lise: Ha, ha, Mr. Saturday Night. (to Alexis) Cheese, trees, keys, what have you... just not Elisabeth Lila, for heaven's sake. (to an orderly) Honey, would you be a dear and go find me a Diet Coke? (noticing Ned's eyes rolling) Don't even start, Mr. Leather Pants. We all have our nasty little habits. Alexis: (to Ned) Leather pants? Ned: Don't ask. Lise: Oooh, she doesn't know the real you yet, does she? (to Alexis) Just you wait. He's simply dreamy in leather. Alan walks up to the group and kisses Lise on the cheek. Alan: Welcome home, Lise. I'm very glad that you're ok. Lise: Home? That might be a stretch. But I appreciate the sentiment. Now, we need to chat about his whole in-patient issue. Alan: Yes, we can do that in the room we have prepared for you. Lise: No that's just it, I really don't need a room... Alan: We're just checking things out, no need to worry. Lise: Alan, just because I'm a pediatrician doesn't mean you have to talk to me like one of my patients. I really think that... Alan: I promised Ned and from the look of your chart here, you should be in real pain. Alan nods to the orderly, who starts wheeling the gurney down the hall. Lise: No, I'm fine, morphine is my friend... Where's my Diet Coke, by the way? Alan, you realize I can walk out of here... Ned, please do something. I'm jumping off this gurney in 3 minutes, I mean it... (her voice gets fainter as she and her entourage disappears down the hall) Ned and Alexis are standing like wreckage in the hall, staring at each other. Ned: So there she is, Lise Ashton, International Woman of Mystery. Has a way of always making a scene. Like my mother, but... in a good way. Just then the orderly arrives off the elevator with a Diet Coke. He looks around bewildered and asks Ned where the patient was taken. Ned: Far, far away. I'll take that. More caffeine is always better. (the orderly walks away) Alexis: So where did the accent come from? Ned: Oh, she spent her formative years in a special nursery school in New Orleans for the toddlers of wealthy jet-setters with better things to do than child-rearing. She had a full-time nanny there who was Mexican and started calling her Liseta. Hence, "Lise". She went to elementary school in Switzerland at a boarding school near mine, but the damage was already done. She sounded like a redneck. Then, when I went to college at Georgetown, I brought her over to a prep school in Virginia, where the accent was reinstated. I went to Harvard for business school, she went to college nearby at Smith, but returned like a homing pigeon to Virginia for medical school. And in the land of Dixie she remained until now. So there you have it. Alexis: So you two were always nearby? Ned: At first, just for convenience, it was easier to have us in the same place in Europe. But, as we got older, it was our choice to stay together. As our parents were less and less interested in us, especially her, we stuck to each other like glue. It was my choice to bring her with me to the States and I'm the one who paid for her schooling once she started college. My parents couldn't have been more apathetic. So we boarding school orphans learn to cling to what we have, as I'm sure you understand. Alexis: Yes... (with a distant look in her eyes) yours is a familiar story to me. Ned: So needless to say, after a few near homicides at Christmas, she stopped coming to Port Charles for any reason. She sort of cut the Quartermaines out of her life and made her close friends in Virginia. I walked her down the aisle a few years ago and didn't recognize a soul on her side of the church. Alexis: She's married? Ned: Was. A brief lapse of rational thought. Alexis: (noticing her cousin approaching them, and loudly enough for him to hear) Speaking of lapses of rational thought... Stefan: Well, aren't we smug today? (he leans over and kisses her, before greeting Ned) Alexis: I learned from the best. Besides, you've been remarkably clear-headed lately. (Stefan gives her reproachful glare) Ned: Oh yes, I heard about the breakup. Congratulations on the display of judgement. Stefan regards Ned without humor. Stefan: Alexis, a word alone, please. Alexis: (apologetically) That's my cue. I'll check up on you and Dr. Ashton later. Ned: (with mischief in his eyes) I can't wait. He slides his arm around her back and pulls her abruptly into him. With a twisted smile at Stefan, he plants a sloppy kiss on Alexis before she has the chance to stab him in the foot with the heel of her pumps and pulls away, embarrassed. Alexis: (whispering) I'll get you back for that. Ned: Ooh I hope so. (to Stefan as he walks away) Stefan. Stefan ignores the greeting and stands impatiently as Alexis collects herself. When Ned is gone, she turns to Stefan. Stefan: I do so appreciate your discussing Katherine with your... (disdainfully) boy-toy. Alexis: Don't be disgusting. And I didn't discuss the details of the situation. He just thinks you saw the light about her and dumped her. A pained look sweeps over Stefan's face. Stefan: Yes, that's what she thinks too. It's been months and she still won't even look at me. Alexis: It's better this way, Stefan. It's for her own safety. Stefan: (brushing off the unpleasant topic) So tell me that there's not another Quartermaine. Alexis: Not exactly. Another Ashton. Stefan: A threat? Alexis: Hardly. She would rather sell body parts than be associated with the family, I gather. Stefan: (eyebrows raised) A potential ally then? Alexis: She doesn't have any interest in ELQ, she's useless in that regard. Besides, I think that her stay in Port Charles will be brief. Stefan: Perhaps we can encourage her to stay? A contact close to Ned could be valuable. Alexis: *I'm* close to Ned, Stefan. Which is why I've asked you not to involve me in ELQ sabotage. Just because you had no qualms interfering with Deception doesn't mean that I could do the same. Stefan: Come now, Cousin, don't tell me your priorities are waning... after all those lectures you gave me. Alexis: Please don't ask this of me. Stefan: Alexis, I have utter confidence that you will put the family before all other considerations when it is necessary. He kisses her on the cheek and walks toward the elevator. Alexis sighs in frustration.   Chapter 3 In a hospital room. Alan: I'm leaving, but I'm sending in a neurologist to confirm that all is well. Lise: With my brain? Good idea. Something must be amiss, if I'm in Port Charles strapped to a hospital bed. Alan: No need for melodrama, Lise. And I reserve the right to use those straps. Lise: Everyone's a comedian tonight. Alan: (leaving the room, to Ned, who has just walked in the door) Be careful with her, there's a full moon out tonight. Lise: Shut up, Alan! Alan: You sound just like Tracy when you say that. (he ducks out the door right before the vase filled with faux flowers breaks on the wall near where his head was.) Lise pouts as she lifts up her gown enough to check out the wrap around her torso. Looking down, she says: Lise: I'm not really like her, am I? Ned: You must be heavily medicated to even ask that question. Lise: Thank you. I hate it here, Ned. I'm supposed to be at work tomorrow, you know? Ned: I took the liberty of informing UVA that you wouldn't be in for a while. Lise: Oh great. Well, while you're on a roll, why don't you make yourself useful. (she fumbles around in her wallet. She holds out a card to Ned) Here, this is the sitter's number. Could you arrange to get Emma here? Ned: I'll send the plane for her tonight. Lise: Good. But don't think for one minute, Ned, that I'm staying here very long. And I'm not setting foot in the temple of doom. Ned: Aww... but Grandmother will so want to see you. Lise: That's what limos are for. Ned: You haven't met Emily yet. Lise: Hence her decline into teen angst. Poor kid. Ned: I've been trying to be there for her. Lise: Ned, as long as she's in that house, around all you psychos, her fate is set. Ned: Well maybe you'll just have to stick around and be her poster child for familial detachment. Lise: Don't hold your breath. I told you before, though, you're welcome to send her to Virginia to visit or even stay. God knows she could use some sanity in her environment. Ned: Agreed. So why would I send her to you? Lise: (deadpan) I'm laughing on the inside. Ned: (laughing) I'll go set up the plane for Emma. Behave. Lise: Ok, but later I want a full report on this Davis woman. Stefan is walking in and hears her last statement. Ned stops in his tracks in front of Stefan. Ned: Are you lost? Stefan: Just making sure that your... sister, is it?... is comfortable. She's an important patient. Ned: Who sees through flattery. You've been warned. (he leaves). Stefan: Ms. Ashton, I hope your room is satisfactory? Lise: That's Dr. Ashton and every patient is an important patient, wouldn't you agree, Dr...?? Stefan: Cassadine, and that's Mr. Lise: (she pretends to be horrified) Oh yes, I've heard all about you and your kind. Are you sure there's enough room in Dodge for both our families? Stefan: Actually, the jury is still out on that. Lise: Oh sheesh, lighten up. I was kidding. Stefan: So was I. Lise: Sure you were. So why the courtesy call? Looking for an ELQ spy? Stefan: (raising his eyebrows) I don't concern myself with small companies like ELQ. Lise: (laughing out loud with her head thrown back, unaware of who she looks like) Neither do I, Mr. Cassadine! Neither do I. Stefan seems somewhat wary of the woman in the hospital bed, not quite sure whether he's won her over or if she's just mocking him. He regards her with distance, his eyes slightly narrowed. Stefan: I just wanted to make sure that all was comfortable for our chief of staff's niece. Lise: Sure you did. (Tony Jones enters the room) You must be from neuro. Tony: I'm Dr. Jones, and yes. (He eyes Stefan warily) Lise: All right then, do your thing, Dr. Jones. You're welcome to sit down, Mr. Cassadine, as long as you don't tell anybody when Dr. Jones here says there is clear indication of brain damage. (Stefan sits in an adjacent chair, somewhat amused) Tony: (smiling and shining a pen-light in Lise' pupils) I'm sure everything's fine. Alan just asked me to do a final check. I've known your family a long time. Lise: Pity. Your home life must be a wreck. Just then, the door burst open and a little boy screams "DADDY!" Lise: Good Lord, boy, you sure know how to make an entrance. Tony: Lucas, I told you wait in my office. (to Lise and Stefan, apologetically) The sitter tonight was sick and my ex-wife is out of town. Lucas: (to Stefan) Hi. Stefan: Hello, Lucas. We've missed you. Tony: Lucas, why don't you wait over by the door, I'll be done in a minute. Lucas: (to Stefan) I miss your house. Mrs. Landsbury is a great cook. Lise: (eyes widening) Hi Lucas, I'm Dr. A. How are you? Lucas: Hi. Lise: So this guy has a cool house, huh? Lucas: It's big and scary, with lots of places to hide. But my mommy hates Stefan now so we had to leave. (Tony looks nauseous) She said he's a bad, bad man. Lise: (smirking at Stefan) Is that so? (to Tony) I had no idea this town was so incestuous. Tony: Let's just say that we've both been married to Lucas' mom. Lise: (to Stefan) Sounds like you need a little Martha Stewart at your place. Stefan: I think not. Lise: Oh really? ( to Lucas) Tell me more about his house, Lucas. Lucas: It's dark and has lots of old stuff that breaks. Lise: (conspiratorially) Sounds ugly to me! Lucas: Yeah, but it was fun, but Mommy says we're not ever going back. I miss Nikolas though. Lise: (to Stefan) Nikolas? Stefan: My nephew. He's 16. Lise: Oh, well, let me know if he needs a pediatrician, y'all being new in town and all. I know some around here. Of course, I'll try to steer you away from the ones who moonlight as serial killers. There's been at least one of those. Stefan: Nikolas is very mature for his age, and is in no need of a pediatrician. And we have our own physicians. Lise: Oh really? Because if he's not seeing a pediatrician, he may not be advised properly about teenaged issues like tobacco use and sexual safety (she smirks as Stefan bristles). You know the drill. Are you providing him with condoms? You can never be too safe. Stefan: (rising quickly to leave) Well, I must get back to my office, but I'm glad your stay here is acceptable. Lise: I don't remember saying that. (Stefan is already out the door) Tony: You did that on purpose. Lise: He seemed a bit high and mighty about his baby boy, and I thought he could use a reality check. Tony: You have no idea. Well, you seem to be in perfect mental condition. Lise: I won't forget you said that. Now, why don't you go find some release papers. Tony: I'm sorry, I can't do that. Alan is the admitting physician, so he'll have to sign them. Lise: Well, then, I suggest you find him. Soon. Tony: So did I hear correctly that you're Ned's sister? Lise: My luck. Tony: Which would make you Tracy's daughter. Lise: I see where this is going and trust me, you don't want to be there. Tony: (laughing) I'll see what I can do. Lise: You do that. Tony passes Edward on the way out, who is on his way in. He comes in without knocking. Ed: Well, look who took time out of her busy schedule to visit. Lise: This is not a visit, Grandfather. Ed: Whatever it is, it's about time. So, were you out driving drunk like your no-good cousin? Lise: Oh would someone just shoot me? (Lise leans back and pulls the covers over her head).   Chapter 4 In the hospital room Edward is sitting next to a sleeping Lise when Alan comes in the room. He stares dumbfounded at the tranquil scene. Alan: Father, tell me you didn't poison her. Ed: No, but I did start talking about the market share of several ELQ subsidiaries. Alan: Well, that explains it. Ed: If you pretend to be asleep long enough, sooner or later it actually happens. Alan: She's very lucky. The accident could have been much worse. Edward watches his granddaughter sleep peacefully and attempts poignancy. Ed: Do you think she really hates us? Alan: Probably. Ed: We never see her anymore. Alan: We never did. Tracy hid Ned and Lise away until they were old enough to hide themselves. Lise: (rolling over, with her eyes still closed) Oh no, are you two having a moment? Alan: Don't worry, it won't last. Lise: How long have I been asleep? Ed: Three hours. Lise: What?!? Where's Ned? Alan: He said something about going to the airport. Lise: Oh, good. Alan, you have 5 minutes starting now to be back in here with release forms for me to sign. Alan: Lise... Lise: Don't even start, you and I both know I'm perfectly fine. Alan: Define "perfectly". Lise: Tick tock tick tock. Alan: Alright alright... (he leaves) Lise: You too, Grandfather, out with you. Ed: Then I'll see you at home later? Your grandmother is anxious to see you. Lise: Um... you betcha. Ed: Hmph.. (he grumpily leaves) Stefan knocks quietly on the door before entering the room. Lise: What is this, Grand Central Station? Stefan: You're still here. I thought you'd have forced your way out by now. Lise: Well, I fell asleep. Someone must have put something in my Diet Coke. I think the butler did it in the Billiard room. So how can I help you Mr. Cassadine? Don't tell me, you couldn't stay away from me. It's the dimples, isn't it? They're the source of all my power. You can't get enough of them. Come on, you can admit it. Stefan: (almost smiling) Actually I was looking for my cousin, have you seen her? Lise: Your cousin. Am I supposed to know every Cassadine on sight? Is there some kind of evil aura that y'all exude as you slink about the hospital in dark suits or something? Stefan: (choosing not to respond to the quip) I thought you met Alexis. Lise: Ohhh.. you mean, my brother's fallen victim to the prettiest member of the evil empire? Should I call a hostage negotiator? (she pauses and studies his expression) You're not getting all huffy now, are you? Stefan: Why should I be? I have yet to hear anything that carries wit worth a response. Lise: Doh! You ARE getting huffy. You try to pretend you're not, because you know I'm just teasing, and yet, you're ultra-defensive about your family's reputation, so any mockery seems malicious. (she puts on a Dr. Ruth accent) Very interesting... is this affecting your sex life? (she can't tell if Stefan's eyes are flashing in anger or twinkling in amusement) (back to her normal voice) Well, actually, let's save that topic for another day. After Lucas Jones' tell-all this evening, I think you've been abused enough. Stefan: Your compassion is touching. Lise: I always root for the underdog. Stefan: Am I the dog in this situation? The door opens before Lise can reply, and Ned, Alexis, and a blond, blue-eyed 3-yr-old walk in. Ned: We come bearing rugrats. Emma: Mama, why are you in the bed? (Stefan's eyes widen at the word "Mama") Lise: (holding her arms out for a hug) Oh I'm just a little tired tonight, baby. How was your plane trip? Emma: Ok. I forgot Oreo. Lise: Oh, that's ok sugar, I'll call Molly's mama and ask her to take care of Oreo until we get home, how's that? Emma: Good. (she curls up on Lise' lap, obviously worn out from her travel and the late hour) Alexis and Stefan are both fidgeting, feeling somewhat uncomfortable in the middle of such a domestic moment. Stefan: (rising) Well, Alexis, why don't you and I head back to Wyndemere and leave Dr. Ashton and her daughter to rest. Lise: (looking up from the child on her lap) Thank you for stopping in, Mr. Cassadine. (she winks at him) You're a good sport, you know. But I won't tell. Ned and Alexis confer in the corner about when they'll see each other next and share a light peck on the lips before Alexis leaves the room with Stefan. Ned settles down in the chair next to the bed and smiles at mother and daughter. Lise: Thanks for getting her, Ned. Ned: She's so huge since the last time I saw her. I guess that's how it will be for my own daughter, for all the time I get to spend with her. Lise: Hey, you gotta put your foot down about that. I like Lois and all, but no way in hell is she keeping you from your baby. Ned: She wouldn't. It's more my own schedule. I don't get to Brooklyn as much as I did when Brooke was first born. Between work and family crises... Lise: And your new Cassadine babe... Ned: (grinning) Oh, yes... that too. So what do you think? Lise: I didn't really talk to her at all today. But she seems somewhat together. Noticed a little baby-lust though. Ned: What the heck are you talking about? Lise: There's a certain sadness that childless, professional women get when they see babies and young children. (looking to see that Emma is sleeping) I see it all the time at the hospital, so many of the doctors and nurses who have chosen careers over kids. Not that I didn't intend to do the exact same thing. Emma was totally unplanned, as you'll remember. So sad that it has to be one or the other for so many women... Uh oh, I feel my inner Steinem lurching up to the surface. Ned: (feigning horror) No, not Gloria! Lise: Pig! So tell me about her. Ned: (with a boyish grin) She gets it. Lise: Gets what? Ned: Me. Us. The family thing. The sacrifice. Lise: Oh please spare me from that whole gate-keeper spiel you always give when you're looking for sympathy. Ned, you *choose* the martyr role, and you don't even do it well! You usually "handle" things that never should have been "handled". Ned: If I didn't do what I do, this family would have self-destructed long ago. Lise: Are you blind? Hello? Wake up and smell the dysfunction! You "protect" the family at the expense of the family members. Ned: What are you talking about? Lise: A.J. (Ned rolls his eyes). Emily. Ned: That wasn't my fault! Lise: Lois. Ned: Ok, stop right there. You weren't even here, I hardly think you're in a position to judge. Lise: Fine. I'll drop it. But you have a habit of fixing things that are better off broken, and then expecting everyone to thank you. Look. I didn't drop it. Ned: Well, at least I don't run away. Lise: I won't even dignify that with an answer. They glare at each other. Lise: Ok, yes I will. I am the only and I repeat, the ONLY one in the family who is actually living a normal life. Everyone who doesn't "run" as you put it ends up utterly destroyed by this place. Name one person who isn't besides Grandmother. Name one Quartermaine who is not in total melt-down or denial most of the time. Ned: Jason. Lise: The other black sheep. I rest my case. Ned's shoulder's sag a bit and he sighs heavily. Ned: Well, at least I'm trying. I've lost my wife and daughter. My little brother is off God-knows-where with Morticia. I haven't seen Father in almost 10 years. It can get kinda lonely you know? Lise: (lightening up) I know. It can get kinda lonely in Virginia, too. Ned: At least you have Emma. Lise: So that's why I'm glad about you and Alexis. Do dish the details. Ned: (smiling) She's brilliant. And complicated. She's totally jaded one minute and a little girl the next. She's a lawyer. Spends her hours toiling away thanklessly for that weird cousin of hers. Lise: What do you have against him? For that matter, what does everyone have against him? I mean, besides the fact that he comes from a loony family. That's clearly not grounds for exclusion from the power posse around here, as our kin can testify. Ned: Well, he's pretty weird. Too formal, tries too hard to be intimidating. Too defensive about his wacko relatives. And the way he raises his kid, man... Lise: His kid? What about the nephew? Ned: Oh, that's what I meant. Well, he's hidden this boy away from the world all this time until one day they just show up in town and try to take over everything. I'm just glad he hasn't gone after ELQ, which is down and out enough as it is... Alexis jokes about him, but they're tight. Some kind of bond they have from being like orphans raised by wolves. Lise: Sounds familiar. Ned: (he strokes Emma's hair absently and smiles at Lise) I guess it does. That's what I mean. Alexis and I are a lot alike. She doesn't question every move I make like Lois did. She doesn't live on the moral high ground, picking and choosing the parts of me that are acceptable. And she makes me laugh. Lise: Well, she's making you happy without changing you. And so I'm going to be forced to adore her. Unless she breaks your heart, of course. Then God help her. Ned: My heart's pretty tough nowadays, Lise. Lise: Well, I hope not for long. Ned: We'll see. Lise: (yawning, lying back on her pillow as Ned arranges Emma next to her) Something makes me think that Alan grabbed those release forms and made a run for the border.